The Truth Of Me & My Herstory.

Well well, after confronting my dearly beloved moronic buddy, faz (take note girls, i’m quoting him), i concluded something.
Well, MEN DO FLIRT EVEN THOUGH THEY’RE ATTACHED. Sounds cruel? Face it! But of course, not all apples are rotten right? I’m trying my best not to over generalize here.
Faz quoted “Well, u know.. men are playful by nature.”
I presumed men… are like dogs? since they can’t be puppy cos puppies are suitable for boys, right? Ever heard, as playful as a puppy? (was that right?)
So men do flirt (according to faz), purposely and accidently.

ACCIDENTLY?? WTF??

This is how i sees it, “Hey u know if a beautiful girl like u can’t seem to find the right guy, probably the right one is in front of u after all… oops.. sorry.. i’m taken. i forgot”
K is that a flirt? hahahahha sorry i’m not good with flirting. Well.. SOMETHING like tat lah..

So i conclude, its ok to flirt for men, but not to a degree where it leads to… “i’m screwed”. heh..

K… If that’s so, what does around comes around. Beyonce’s best song “If i were a boy” will be a great rendition of THINK BEFORE YOU ACT.

For now, let me sob silently.

Recently, or rather yesterday, i… i…. hmm.. i got myself into a guilt trap. GG and i had planned to go to his fren’s bday bbq @ changi. It was a lovely day, according to him. Partly cloudy with no rain was his favourite type of day. While me, i prefer it to be sunny. U know the morning sunny or 5 o’clock sunny time. K… tat’s not wat i wanna blog abt.
Before we attended the bbq, i had to follow him to his office due to his unfinished work. Met his manager there.  Nice guy who only smile cos he was too shy to talk to me. Yeah whateva. So, while waiting for him, i decided to play Chess on his  Sony Ericsson hp. After playing for a while, Evil adlin poked me to check his inbox. yeah yeah.. i know. Again, i made that mistake. Well, u know when a gf feels something is not right, she jus gotta do it. Well she can choose not to. But i DID.

Surprise Surprise. Wait… Not so surprised afterall. There were smses with some girls. But most of them were jus his frens.. except, one girl whom he nicked, ELMO. Awweee… pretty cute huh.

after reading a few sms from her to him and from him to her, F*$%! i realised this was AGAIN, another flirty smses. This guy obviously didnt learn his lesson. I’m sick of this. I learnt that this ELMO LAMEO was liaised with his company. I presumed she works at the counter of her office cos that was wat stated in the sms. Why am i not surprised, he did addressed her “hon” and she replied back with “deary”. K.. that was only one msg like tat.

They acknowledged each other as … “AWAK.. AWAK… KITA.. KITA…”

Sigh… nak act the cute kampung style pulak.

So whatever. I mean, seriously, when i read thru all his sms, i became numb. My heart felt so…. soo…  (this is where i played the song “I BECOME SO NUMB…..” by Linkin Park)

1st caught – Intan Haizura, a malaysian who lives near his place and works in KL.
2nd caught – Lina from Terengganu whom he met during his Bike Touring with his pakcik pakcik bike gang. But she’s married now.
3rd caught – Siti Mazidah, i seriously dunno abt this girl, it was in his SMS too. yes with flirty sms.
4th caught – a chi girl. i forgot her name. According to him, she actly flirted w him, wanted to kiss him but he shoved her away when we broke up.
5th caught – Akisha. A successful lady who works as an insurance agent, drive a Honda erm… that hummer-looking car. Sorry i forgot the name of it.
6th caught – ELMO. Some b.itch working at a counter who has to liaise with his company. probably thats where they met.

He still doesn’t know that i knew abt all these nonsense. But in my mind, i wonder if it is ok for a guy to flirt behind his girl’s back. I mean girls do too right? In a girl’s point of view… of cos its a NO NO.. but i dunno wat a guy’s perception towards this befuddled issue. Perhaps, one may argue that, as long as they are not married, they shouldn’t feel compelled to flirt. U think?

But… the point is, i haven’t been flirting with anyone. I probably try to act cute to guys i know but… there was never a flirting moment between us. So.. why is my bf doing this to me? Such sorrow has bestowed upon me.

Why?

I went out yesterday. The original plan was, to get my sch books then jus head home. I called Shash hoping she’s somewhere near central. Well, she just got home by the time i called her. hehehe! then i remembered… ooohh oohh! kinny shud be finishing her work soon! and she was surely at central area. So i decided to wait for her and head home together. Then i got a sudden urge for fondue. So i thought, maybe i shall treat her cos i owed her for haircut. hehehehhe! and there we go.. we had our chocolate fondue.
i heard Shash and Kinny wanna go around singapore looking and rating all fondues they will get to taste.
o btw, Kinny and i went to Max Brenner. So my ratings?

Max Brenner:
Taste – 8/10 (it’s thick and there’s strawberries and marshmellow)
Price – 9/10 (very reasonable)
Location – 8/10 (its at esplanade, central but its a drag to walk all the way to MRT)
Service – 7/10
Ambience – 7/10

Breeks (just the fondue)
Taste – 6/10 (i jus don’t like the avocado but the choc fondue is nice.)
Price – 7/10 (its quite ex.. hmm i forgot the price but i know its not worth it)
Location – 7/10 (i tried at Harborfront. So its really far)
Service – 7/10
Ambience – 5/10 (the place where i sat, there was so many flies. I bathed! mind u) 

I was down with fever. Then with headaches. Fever come and go.
It has been a pretty rough week for me. I was sick the whole entire week! Bedridden. Vomitting. Fever. Headaches. Migraine. Cough.
I actually thought i had dengue. Despite that, i refused to go to the doctor. Well, i actually did. But by the time i went there, the doctor simply refused to open the gate. Heheheheh! Neh, i forgot my family doctor closes on friday afternoon onwards and i reached there about 5pm. Hey, i was too weak to get up from the bed.

Thanx to my sickness, i missed my outing with my girlfriends for fondue! Although i was the first to taste the fondue, i didnt enjoyed it! Why? Because of all the days to get fever, it had to be on that day i was looking out for fondue cafes. Yasmin and i went to Max Brenner at Esplanade. By the time we got there and had our orders, i was already feeling Feverinda came attacking my good cells. I didnt finished my strawberries and mashmellows. Its ok. I’ll go with my boyfriend.

Eh! no! i wanna go with Yush Tush!! Best fren!!! we go ok? hahahaha!

k come on!!! i want the four of us to be together to indulge a sexy moment of fondue…. dipping masmellows and strawberries… yummy..

oohh…. ohhh…oommmm m…mmmm…. mamamamiaaa..

I’m seriously bored at home without anything to do. Well, actually there’s alot of chores to do though. But u know, i;m not the “housewife” or “good daughter” kinda girl who helps around the house. I have to be screamed at and yelled at, then i’ll get my ass off the bed. Ok.. My niece is actually reading what i’m typing. Say hi to Nabila. She’s bored too.

I just came back from Gelare with Mek, i mean Tasha. I had an urge to eat Waffles. Nabila didnt follow cos she was sulking. Why? Oh.. It’s because she couldn’t find a pair of good pants to go out. Yeah i know. Lame. I realised i’m her Sulky Predecessor. muahahahha! But i don’t sulk over a pair of pants.

K right now she’s complaining and whining about how bored she is. I don’t understand why she is bored when she has thousand of things to do. I had thousands of imaginations and things to do. C’mon my fellow generations! We had great childhood eh. K, ya i was lonely but i got my toys to keep me company. I played alone and i’m still happy and retain my sanity. HAHAHAHAH!
I miss my childhood…

Latest News: Qistina can walk already! On her own! yay!

recently, i did some hands on with my hair… yes. i have nothing to do but to do experiments with my hair. After watching a few youtube videos sent by marvellous creative senders, i decided to try it out on my hair. so.. these are some of the hairstyles i did. I realised i can do alot with long hair. I can even shorten my hair without snipping it off… yay!! hurray! ok.. maybe some of you already knew that, but hey! i guess, i lagged a bit. OK maybe alot. O, yeah, i upload a picture of me with my original hair length as well.. so yeah. U can do the comparison.

this is the latest Trade-For-CD freelance modelling. Not the pretty-type of model ur hoping for of course. But at least i know i have the fierce look that corresponded with the theme of the TFCD project, Punk Rock. hah.

I’ll upload more if i have the time.

YaY! i woke up with no cramp. Miss Cramp already gone. Be-gone. Bygone. yay! Berambus!
& i got a new problem. My keypad for “1″ has problem. i gotta keep pressing it hard hard hard for it to work. Oh No! problem. !111!11!!!11111 see!?!? its so hard… well.. i know ya’ll cant see. o well.
I was browsing through the Recruit section of the newspaper. Since today is Saturday, there should be a detached version of the section. Guess wat, there isn’t. This shows how bad the economy is. Usually there’ll be 2 external pages for just “Recruit” sections. While browsing through, i realised, i am indeed qualified for those “2 years experiences needed in civil draughtsman”. But… neh..

Still pondering what to do next…

Hello Everyone.

HAHAHAHAHAHAH! Such a corny opening welcome message. “hello everyone”. * knock on self head*

I was blog-hopping.. reading about some malay marriage custom thingy. Dowries, marriage loans, family planning, etc etc etc. . .

I’m not ready. Period. But I NAK KAHWIN. but… i’m not ready. Simply because, my future is blurry. i’m not given the power to concur if the person who will be my life partner. I’m not able to be assured who will be the perfect match for me, who will guide me tru’ Allah’s way, who will provide and shower me with love blessings and wealth,who can take good care of me til the day i close my eyes and u know the rest.

Yes i’m seeing someone. But i always have this… u know.. instincts and thoughts that he may not be the one for me. So I’m still unsure. My mom has mother’s instincts, telling me that the guy i’m loving now may not be in relationship with me for long. I’m kinda sad. I love him. Dearly. But why do i always feel so insecure. I want to cry now. If he’s nt the one for me, why is it so hard for me to part with him? Why am i not strong enough to be single-status? Why do i keep going back to him after our “time-off”? why why why? I can make him laugh, and i had even made him cry and mad. And his temper is most-of-the-time uncontrollable. Yet i still forgive him. MY GOSH~ but.. above all, he does make me feel complete. i dunno man~ i dunno. He loves me dearly too.

I just hope the right one will come to me. and I hope i’m given strength to face challenges and obstacles in front of me.

Haaaa~

Jus got back! From roller blading outing with my cutie mutie dimpled bestie. hahahahaha! Eww~ Who else who own that deep dimple… Oochilala. (yUSH). I had magnific time with her. Ya of cos she (being typically yush) nvr fails to act cute and nvr fails to put a smile on my face.
Guess Wat!?  I was still finding the momentum on how to roller blade well until “Blisterenza” came along… Came attacking my skins. Rubbing against the wall of the inner part of my roller blades with much pleasure. DAMN U BLISTERS! Then an expert in Blading, Eunos (eh i dunno how to spell his name.. so i stole it from the MRT station), told us that it was prolly due to the way i wore the roller blade. Too lose. yeah, he was right. Anyway, cut it short, we enjoyed ourselves despite the walking from the food place to Parkway Parade area bustop..somewhere there la.

Btw, I’m really inspired. everytime i went out with Yush, i always felt inspired to do something. She gave me great tips and advice on alotta things. I’m not a consistent person, but at least she inspires me to be one. U know, I know she’ll be a great inspiring teacher one day. She may seem to be the strict and discipline one, but i can tell u, when she’s out of her shell, SHE’LL BE A MANIAC! a maniac u will adore that is. I love you Yush.

And yes! i must say this, I hope my best friends will meet up once again. must have full strength, so Fab 4 will be complete. I enjoyed the karaoke session. Even though it was only a short moment i could hang around with the girls, i still treasure that alot. Babes, we’ll be together once again.